I was looking at the last few posts and they've been bordering to near dead-seriousness already. Before my sanity goes overboard, here goes ...
Whenever I feel like an idiot (like today), i try to recall the most idiotic moments of my life and think to myself "Boy, today could have been much worse". And so, here i am reminiscing...
...THE TOP ABSOLUTELY MOST IDIOTIC THINGS I HAVE EVER UTTERED...
...to a cute lit major:
Girl: "...right now im reading Hugo"
Me: "...Oh I love his works!"
(I knew Les Miserables was NOT Pronounced Less Miserabless)
"In fact Ley Miserabley is really one of my favorites :)"
...to a married woman:
Me: ...ey! Ur Anita Kurishima* right?
MW:...actually, its Anita Quirino now.
Me: ...so...ahhh... Why did u change your name?
*Names have been changed to pretend my innocence
...to a gorgeous freshman student council wannabe:
Girl: ...hey wait! Ive talking to you for the past hour... ARE you telling me that you are NOT a freshman??!
Me: I thought it was a good pickup line.
Little Homer Simpson Voice at the back of my brain: DOOOOPE!!!
...while ordering at the McDo counter while dripping wet after being drenched by a July Supertyphoon:
Counter Girl: "1 Hot choco. Anything else sir?"
Me: "I'll have a hot fudge sundae."
Counter girl: "..."
**gives me the most incredulous look i have ever seen on a counter girl**
...to a most honest waitress who picked up my wallet and called me up to give it back:
(Counts wallet's money in front of her.)
Me: "Thanks again!"
...while ordering at the Jollibee drivethru counter:
Drivethru girl: "Sir, One Champ meal, go large, One palabok fiesta, One hot fudge sundae and Peach Mango Pie... Anything else sir?"
Me: "Thats all."
DTG: "How about your drink?"
Me: "Diet Coke"
DTG: "..." **Gives me the most incredulous look i have ever seen on a drive thru girl**
Me: *sheepish voice* "...im on a diet?"
...while calling a pretty girl at her house AFTER her phone curfew:
The Sleepy Dad Answering: *Yawn* "HELLo?" *Yawn*
Let me pause at this stage. Normally, when i dial the wrong number, or when someone i dont like answers the phone, I usually have a built in excuse randomly picked from my ever dependable mental list of excuses. And here i go using one of them. Back to the story.
Me: "Uhh... is this ...Tech Support?"
The Sleepy Dad Answering: "This is tech support."
Me: *panicky voice* "Oh shit"
The Now Awake Dad Answering: "Who is this please?"
Which only goes to show that i am at my mentally worst whenever theres a pretty girl involved... or im just damn hungry.
I will end this public show of humiliation while you still has some respect for me...
As if there ever was... :)